The Liar

I feel its time to let the cat out of the bag, the genie out of the bottle, to break character, drop the mask and tell you the truth. I think you deserve it.

 

You see the truth is I lie, a lot. I don’t just simply stretch the truth a little; I live in a world of fabrication, deception and outright fantasy.

 

The fabrication bit is the hardest to maintain as it’s easy to slip up with the little details. There has to depth to a good lie, it has to be real enough to be plausible, mundane enough to be believable, small enough to slip past almost unnoticed.

 

Deception is tricky the easiest way to do it is to pass off other people’s misfortunes and accomplishments as your own. This isn’t as easy as it sounds you need to know every intricate detail of the event that has now happened in your life as far as the people you tell are concerned.

 

Fantasy is the easiest this is simply things you want to happen, the person you want to be or the person other people want you to be. We all lie on this front, everybody lies about who they are to some degree. There are many reasons for it all as valid as each other, from a simple bumping up of exam grades on your cv to omitting things about yourself to the woman in the bar, Really this isn’t actually lying to them, you just haven’t told them the truth.

 

Now we have covered the basis of my deceitful existence we can move on to the finer points. Firstly why do I lie?

 

 This simple sounding question is almost impossible to answer. Every lie has a difference purpose.

 

Some lies back up other lies.

 

I was in a fight, this is the first lie it spikes your interest.

What happened? I had my nose broke, this is the second it gains sympathy.

But I broke his jaw, this is the third it bolsters my hardman image.

 

Truth is I have never thrown a punch in anger in my entire life. These three simple little lies can flow fast and the order can change depending on the situation. They can be extended as well.

 

Why did I break his jaw?

He jumped me and tried to mug me, self defence.

He was hitting his girlfriend so I stepped in, noble cause.

 

I go from thug to possibly misguided hero in two easy little fabricated steps

 

A deceptive lie would run like this

 

I was in the nightclub and this girl said if I scored her some tabs I could go back to her place with her and her girlfriend.  

 

I hate nightclubs, I am painfully shy, I have never, nor would ever take drugs and I would never have sex with a near stranger in this day and age. The deception hides all this.

 My sister knows a girl who does this, uses stupid men to buy her drinks and drugs in the hope of a hot threesome that will never happen I just turn it to me being the lucky fellow.

 

Fantasy could be anything

 

When me and my sister were little she fell into the river and I pulled her out and saved her from drowning.

 

I don’t have a sister; I grew up as a lonely only child who yearned for a playmate and to be the protective big brother.

 

So in short I lie to make myself look bigger, stronger, and kinder. To hide the truth and make myself feel better. I lie to pass the time, for my own amusement, so I have something to add to the conversation instead of standing there on the sidelines like a mute. I lie to make you feel better about yourself; I lie so you like me.

 

But you have to ask yourself, how much of what I just told you is the truth?

 

Because it can’t be all of it.