More Happy Green Forest

Narrrator: With Autumns fingers gripping Happy Green Forest and winters breathe blowing down its neck. Some of the Animals have a long sleep ahead…



Harold Hedgehog is out scavenging for food before his hibernation


Harold (muttering to himself) : Bread and milk? Bread and milk I ask you, what good is bread and milk to anyone?

Harold stops muttering and creeps towards a fallen tree where a bright Orange Caterpillar, wearing spectacles, is sat reading.

Harold : AHAA! Lunch!

Colin (looking up at Harold, over his glasses) : Oh. Sorry, what?

Harold: I said Lunch

Colin: Oh. No thank you, I haven’t long eaten

Harold (confused) : No I more meant you are my lunch

Colin: Oh. No, sorry

Harold: What do you mean sorry?

Colin: Oh. I mean, I don’t want to be your lunch

Harold: Well I wasn’t really asking

Colin: Oh. I see well, the answer is still no

Harold: Like I said I wasn’t asking so ... I’m just going to eat you now

Colin: Oh. You can’t do that

Harold: And why not?

Colin: Oh. I won’t let you

Harold: And just how are you going to stop me?

Colin: Oh. Well I believe in non violence you see, so my first course of action would be to educate you on why you can’t eat me

Harold: And why is that?

Colin: Oh. Well for starters I am a sentient being, I have feelings, I think therefore I am! To eat me would be the act of a simple minded barbarian

Harold: Well that doesn’t really cut it pal

Colin: Oh. Secondly you sir are an omnivore, the eating of me is little more than opportunistic greed. We live in a bountiful forest full of rich goodness for you to feast on and yet you chose me simply because you have found me.

Harold (muttering) : Found a bowl of bread and milk

Colin (mockingly) : Oh! I see and that didn’t sate your appetite?

Harold (sullen) : Didn’t eat it … makes me doings hard

Colin: Oh. how pleasant

Harold: Anyway I has found you, now I’m going to eat you

Colin: Oh. I haven’t finished yet, You can’t eat me. I have yet to reach my full potential, for soon I shall cocoon myself in a chrysalis and emerge later as a beautiful butterfly spreading the joys of spring and helping to pollinate the forest, Selflessly helping a whole manner of life to continue.
Or maybe I’ll be a Moth don’t know yet … need to speak to my careers officer about that one I mean Butterflies are a bit … um well gay aren’t they?

Harold: Still don’t care

Colin (dejected) : Oh, Umm I haven’t finished my book? Ooh I know!
Look I am Orange and that means I could be poisonous! You eat me and I’ll make you ill!

Harold snatches Colin and rams him into his mouth, swallowing him whole.

Narrator: And so children the circle of life continues in Happy Green Forest, Harold will later be eaten by an Owl called Darren. Take care you!

Harold:Wait, what? Will I? That sucks.